I dont know why ive abandonned this blog, i realize now how much i have truely missed it. It my own escape from the everyday world where i can pour out every inch of my feelings-good or bad-to people who will truely listen and dont judge. *sigh*
anyway, i just finished christmas break, and am proud to say im back on track. after a few complete binges, I somehow got my mind back into the need to lose weight, and am proud to say i have done so. Wisdom teeth out=5 days of almost complete fasting with the aid of a painful mouth and several wonderful prescription drugs a day. I definitely see how easy it is for a lot of girls living with ED to resort to drugs as a method of weight loss, but i just cant take being that knocked out all the time. anyways, so i think ive lost 8 or so lbs since my last post. Also, ive gotten together with some people in my dorm and we've created a "biggest loser" competition to see who can lose the most weight this semester. Not only am i motivated to do it because i feel so HUGE, but im also EXTREMELY competetive, and i will not let myself lose.
so besides the weight issue, what else has been going on in my life? well, not a whole lot. For anyone whos been reading, i'm sad to say that my hope of a relationship with the afforementioned "M" is not going to work out. what a shame. but i dont care, i dont need a boyfriend. My last boyfriend is one of the biggest reasons i became so insecure in the first place. I'm loving the single life. I've also had several one-time hook ups since then, none of which i am particularly proud of, but i had my fun in the first semester. This semester though, I'm all business. I dont want to be someone who hooks up all the time, or drinks incessantly. i dont want to be "that girl." ive got enough in my life to worry about which is way more important, so i'm going to try to give my life back to God as much as possible, concentrate on my school, and not drink so damn much. I am proud to say though, that I haven't had a single drink since halloween. forgive the pun but....cheers to me!
I've also been trying to read more lately, and I'm really getting into "The Lost Symbol"
Im not a big reader, in fact im ashamed to say that the only books i have really ever read was the twilight series (and dont give me those dirty thoughts, there isnt a girl out there who wouldnt throw herself onto Edward Cullen if he truely existed) but i want to get into more advanced, mature reading, so i'm just starting with this. It's a little strange so far, but i'm hooked, and I would definitely recomend it to anyone who's considering reading it.
ok well enough about my boring life, i need to get ready to go work out. I'm really going to start putting more time into this blog, but bear in mind that im still very new to this whole thing, and don't really know what im doing. I'd like to have more readers, so if anyone knows how to get more people to visit your page, I would gladly appreciate it. =]