well well well. it's happened again. i've returned to the person that i was 2 years ago. my life is exactly the same as it was then....only much less fun.
what has happened? Well let me tell you.
I'm drunk. Not right now, but I have been quite a bit lately. Went to a party last night, and the make-out slut made her big return after a loooooooooooong vacation. Woke up with a ginormous hickey. yippee. wanna know what the best part about this is?
L and I are going to lunch today. two weeks ago, drunk me got flirtacious with him, and all the sudden, he stopped talking to me. I texted him three days later asking what was going on, and he said he just needed time away from me, and that we should both be moving on. Well fuck you, move on i did. moved on right into the arms of a nobody, with a great body, and woke up with this little "souvenir" from the night. Honestly, I hope he sees it today. Im going to try to cover it, but maybe if he sees it, he'll realize that im done sitting around wasting all my time waiting for him. He'll realize that he's not exactly a prize, and if he doesnt want me, well, there are plenty of other people out there that do.
Last night though, it was different. I didnt enjoy it. Dont get me wrong, the party itself was AWESOME....but kissing this boy....it didnt do anything for me. Not a single thing. He was incredibly attractive, the kiss had all the makings of a super hot kiss, but really, throughout the whole thing, i was really thinking... "well, i'm bored with this." There was no adventure or excitement in it anymore. Now I only want to kiss people i have a legitimate connection with.....which is good i guess, but why cant I let myself enjoy some fun in the meantime?
I havent been eating all that great, but i've gotten into a workout kick, and ive been spending an hour at the gym every day, and actually enjoying it (which is monumental for me, who despises working out.) The scale said 136.6 on tuesday I believe...which is up a bit from this summer, but i really am pretty content with how my body looks. I want to get toned now, and have some ripped muscles, but i dont necessarily need to get skinnier.
i was facebook creeping some people the other day, and i came across this girl i went to highschool with. Back then, she probably weighed close to 200 lbs. Now, she probably weighs 110....if that. wtf, how did she do this???? i wish i had been closer to her so i could ask. seriously though, its insane. Welp, guess i found some new thinspo!
Ok guys, so, sorry for the randomness and the kind of chaos that i wrote this post with...i just tried to compact quite a bit of info into as short of a post as i could. better writing next time, promise. :)